Flapping My Left Wing by Hannah Fortune

As the weekend rolled around, and she received by e-mail, the reminder about Standing On The Corner For Peace, Chick felt herself becoming energized. “Why! I think I’ve rediscovered my social conscience!” thought Chick. Maybe she could round up a few friends to join the group. She knew that inviting Henny was a lost cause, but perhaps Ducky Lucky and Goosey Loosey would accompany her. (Turkey Lurkey was of skiing in North Carolina.)
“Hi Ducky, it’s me,” said Chick when Ducky answered the phone.
“Me. I know quite a number of folks named Me, including Me,” Ducky said in a vaguely sarcastic tone.
“Listen, Ducky, cut the crap, I have something important to tell you”, replied Chick, already exasperated.
“You always do, my dear Chick. I believe last time it was something about the sky?”
“That was a long time ago, Ducky,” said Chick, her face turning hot with embarrassment as she recalled the acorn incident. Still, Chick told him with enthusiasm all about her stand on the corner last week and the wonderful women she’d met.
“Oh, Chick, Chick, Chick”, Ducky said with a long drawn out sigh. “When will you learn? The sixties are over! Everything is done on the Internet these days. Yes, I fully support your efforts, but I shall be protesting from the comfort of my armchair, thank you very much! Count me out, honey! But give Goosey a jingle. She may well be up for making a public display of herself. I hear she’s lost fifteen pounds!” Ducky chortled. “Ta-ta. Gotta go”
“Geeezzz. Men.”, thought Chick. ” Why do I bother?”
She dialed Goosey, who was delighted to hear from her, at least until Chick asked her to stand on the corner. “Oh, Chick, I just couldn’t. I’m so sorry. Not here in town. I could lose clients. Look, I’ll go to D.C. with you, or Orlando again, but not in our small town. Try Turkey. Or Henny Penny.”.
“Turkey’s out of town”, said Chick, “and well…..Henny’s not the Henny we knew any more. She told me she’s voting for McCain.”
“Honk!!! What?”, yelled Goosey, coughing and choking on the slice of chocolate cake she was enjoying as they spoke. “You must be joking!”
“I wish I were. She switched her party, from Green to Republican a couple of months ago. I can’t believe she’s not backing Hillary!”
“Oh, that just can’t be true”, sighed Goosey, calming down a bit. “No one in their right mind would vote for that war monger. And he may choose Huckabee as his running mate! I swear, if those two end up in the White House, my entire flock is heading for Mexico!”
Chick began to feel uneasy. Was there something amiss with her old friend Henny’s mind? For surely no woman in full possession of her faculties would support a man like John McCain, a man who would keep our country in Iraq for what?…..100 years?…..1000 years? A man who was quite happy to have the support of Pastor John Hegee, whom Chick had nightmares about. Yes, McCain was Bush with a brain, an evil brain.
So, something was definitely up with Henny. She had been dressing rather strangely of late, showing up at a Sierra Club meeting wearing red Converse hightops and a poodle skirt!, thought Chick, forgetting that she, too, sported the same footwear.
Lost in this quite unpleasant reverie, Chick remembered that Goosey was still on the phone. “Sorry,” said Chick, “I was spacing out. Let’s do lunch soon. We’ll go down to The Cup And Saucer,and if she pulls that McCain ca-ca in there she’ll have to deal with Patricia. Oh, by the way, I hear your new diet’s been working.”
“Uh, well…..I had company, we ate out a lot, and you know, well, it’s hard”, Goosey stammered, her mouth full of chocolate. “Call me. We can go next Wednesday for music.”
So, a mite disillusioned, but still determined, Chick went to the corner on Monday without her closest friends. And sadly, this week only two other women were there. “Damn it all!”, said Chick, in a burst of profanity, that, for her, were becoming increasingly common. “There oughta’ be hundreds of people out here protesting this illegal war!”
And Goosey should be here, thought Chick. That would give new meaning to their sign Honk For Peace! At least Chick still had her sense of humor.

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